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ewoks February 11, 2007

Posted by d.w. in misc.
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yoda + wookies = ewoksi think wookies and ewoks have to be related. right? they’re way different from any other star wars species. one website claimed that they were both descendents of ewookies. but that’s totally ridiculous. remember how the ewoks take a liking to chewbacca at the end of episode 6? well, they take a liking to everyone (especially ceeps), but it seems like there’s some sort of deeper connection between wookies and ewoks. just like everything in star wars, the answer to their relationship comes in episode iii.

ewoks are the offspring of wookies and yoda. he’s been around for like 900 years or something so he’s always had this secret relationship with wookies. they hid their offspring on the forest moon of endor because yoda, being on the jedi council, was supposed to let go of everything he was afraid to lose. but you know yoda, he’s not going to give up his spot on the council by coming clean. here’s the evidence for this in episode iii. mace windu is like, “the droid army is attacking kashyyk. we should send someone.” and then yoda says, “go, i will. good relations with the wookies i have.” what he’s actually saying is “good sexual relations with the wookies i have.” he probably had a secret wedding just like anakin.

it makes sense too. ewoks are just like miniature, primitive versions of wookies. miniature because of yoda. primitive because they live in hiding one of endor’s moons..

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Comments»

1. pillow.talk - February 11, 2007

I read once on this (lameish) mormon website something that said that gravity caused the death of the dinosaurs. I think it was your brother who said it. Something along the lines that it was the gravity effect that killed the dinosaurs because they suddenly began to weigh a lot more.

so maybe the ewoks are what they are because their distant relatives were average wookies that decided to colonize the hidden moon of endor, not knowing the extra gravitational pull. so now they’re short. it’s evolution. (or visa-versa)

2. emily - February 13, 2007

duh! originally, the final scenes of return of the jedi were supposed to take place on a planet of wookies, but it was too expensive or something, so they changed the name around and hired the much more affordable little actors and made it a planet of george lucas look-alikes. everybody knows that.

3. Guy - February 23, 2010

actually George Lucas wanted a primitive species to over through the empire. They intended wookies but Chewbaca was already intelligent with mechanics and they created ewoks.


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